Etiquette at the Table: Mottahedeh Memo
Eating is an experience we take part in every day. But dining is an experience that elevates the act of eating to a cultural and social interaction that can be uplifting to everyone involved.
The beauty of nature is a standard for the beauty and unity that can be created in our man-made surroundings, architecture, design and art. A beautiful table or buffet served to intimate friends or new acquaintances is a delight to the mind, eye, and soul. It's a combination of art, nature, floral arrangements, beautiful fabrics, relationships and the sustenance of life; food.
The “rules of engagement “ have changed dramatically over the last10 years. The biggest change in our eating style is the movement from a formal sit down experience to a casual-not-necessarily-at-the-table meal. Or people are eating in the grab-and-go method. "I don't have time to sit down, I hardly have time to chew. Let me multi-task and eat in the car while I drive to work." Okay, maybe that's just me in the mornings... but regardless, I think we can all attest to partaking in the "grab & go" at one time or another.
Research, however, has shown that for family members to develop intimate bonds, a shared experience is required, and it is important to get together for at least one sit-down meal a day. It's not always easy, but it's worth it. When I was growing up, Monday through Thursday of every week (and Sunday nights) my entire family (and any friends who were over visiting) would come together for dinner and have a sit down meal.
The meal would be kicked off with a, "Call your siblings to the table," followed by a loud scream down the hall, "DINNER!!" and then an annoyed mother saying, "Stop screaming and go tell them." It was similar every night. We'd sit down, we'd talk about our days, we'd laugh about things that only family members find funny when they're together, and we always knew we were expected to be home in time for dinner. It was a routine that was establish early on in our lives, so when we'd be asked to set the table - generally we remembered which side of the plate the knife and fork were supposed to be placed.
With the change in culture from a traditional style to a casual one, many people don’t have experience with what is expected of them in a formal setting. The move away from the formal or elegant style of dining may have to do with not wanting to do something wrong or embarrassing.
When we don’t know about a certain topic we often approach learning about it in multiple ways; perhaps we try to find out about it before embarking on a path, we might avoid the whole subject entirely, or we jump in blind and hope for the best. The tough-skinned people are those that jump in head first, without wading in the shallow end. As they say, “When in Rome, do as the Romans do!"
But what the heck do the Romans do?!?
Mottahedeh Memo is a How To: for setting the table and dining etiquette in a more formal setting. I'll be posting a Mottahedeh Memo at least once a week over the next few weeks. So be sure to check back! And if you have specific questions you'd like to learn about - leave us a comment and we'll be sure to address it!
Seen in the image above: Prosperity 4pps (MV1600) - $210